When you find one, you want to share the book with the world, tell about what you’ve learned from it, how it impacted your ideas and the way you see the world. I guess this is exactly what I’m doing with this review: the book in question is His Secret Obsession by James Bauer.
The book can make you open your eyes about some aspects of your love life; in particular, the book is aimed at helping women make their men commit to them over the long term.
How can they do so? By coming to know, through the book, the primal desires of men. I know this seems a little naif or even utopic, but the book offers a really interesting point of view.
Keep on reading to find why, in my opinion, His Secret Obsession by James Bauer is totally worth the hype!
Who’s behind His Secret Obsession?
Before becoming an author, James Bauer is a trained psychologist. His studies have always been focused on the intricacies of men's and women’s brains and how they differ or are alike.
Such studies have brought him in the path of becoming a relationship coach, so - for 12 years - he has worked with hundreds of men and women to help them strengthen their relationships, solve their problems, overcome the low moments.
This long experience with couples helped him discover what he believes is the secret of developing long, stable, and satisfying relationships. His approach is therefore based on his education as a psychologist and his twelve-year experience.
His secret obsession isn’t his first book. He has already published a book called What men secretly want that is just as interesting as the one we’re discussing in this article, for it can really open your mind to the understanding of how men’s minds work differently from women’s.
With His Secret Obsession, James Bauer wanted to dig deep in the men’s mind revealing the secret of what their deepest and most primal desires are. The promise was very attractive, I couldn’t avoid reading this book.
So, I did it! This is what I think about it. However, I also want to share some information about what to expect from this book. This article is basically everything you need to know before purchasing the His Secret Obsession ebook.
What is His Secret Obsession?
His Secret Obsession is a simple ebook, however, you won’t find it available on Amazon or any online or traditional book shop.
The book is available only on its official website, and this is made for offering additional guarantees. This is not only a book. It’s a real guide on how to make your relationship with your man grow solid and last long. The author makes a promise and he wanted to commit to it.
How many times did you buy a book that promised great revelations and end up turning just one more support to lift your computer when it’s too hot?
It happened many times to me, and on none of those occasions, I had the possibility to have my money back, or at least contact the author or someone on his behalf to ask questions or have additional information.By making His Secret Obsession ebook available on a specific website, the author was able to offer guarantees on the result: support with the website teams and a guarantee scheme that allows you to ask for your money back if you decide the secrets and information contained in the book aren’t worth the money spent.
What’s inside the book?
The Hero Instinct
One of the main content shared in the book is that men want to feel like heroes. This is the main secret of men’s most primal desires. Awakening his hero instinct, as Bauer calls it in the book is the best is the biggest secret for becoming a man’s deepest passion, his life priority, his secret obsession.
The book claims that the one thing man wants is to feel like heroes. According to James Bauer, it goes back to our primal nature. No matter how in love men are, they need the woman they’re with to bring out her instinct or they will always feel like there’s something wrong or missing in their relationship.
According to the author of the book, the hero instinct is a biological drive, on a par with hanger, thirst, and sex. That’s why, when you know how to trigger a man’s hero instinct he’ll do anything to make you happy.
Throughout the book, you come to understand that this isn’t only referred to the classic “alpha man”. When the author refers to the hero instinct, he goes beyond the need of the man of taking care of the house, providing for his family, and things like that.
Bauer refers to something deeper: a drive for meaning, respect, the will to provide for the people they care… this is common to all men, and once you’ve read the book you won’t find that hard to understand it.
The greatest thing about the book is that not only it shares with you this secret. Once you know the secret, what would it matter if you don’t know how to trigger this hero instinct in your man?
The book does share the ways you can trigger this instinct, this is how it becomes a real guide on how to build a stronger relationship with your man. It describes step-by-step guides with samples, actionable strategies that you can use to awaken the hero in your man.
The book can be divided into two parts: the first part is dedicated to making the reader understand the hero instinct that is in every man, and how important and primal it is in their nature.
In the second part, strategies and techniques to be applied in your relationship to awaken the hero instinct in your man are provided.
The strategies will help you in several ways:
- You can gain your man’s attention and love and build a throng relationship for the long term
- In case you’re facing a crisis, this book can help you guys go through it and make the interest you had for each other to come back like before.
I’d like to point out that the book is not about manipulation or using silly tricks to get your man commit to you.
The book will help you share your needs so that your man will be able to fulfill them. I’ll go into the detail of this later, but this book is helpful for both the members of the couple.
While women are invited to share their feelings and needs, men are helped feel better about themselves. You’ll see each other in a new light.
Rachel is a fake name that has been used in the book to share the experience of a real woman. I particularly appreciated this part because I managed to have a full understanding of the hero instinct through the experience of this real woman.
Rachel is one of Bauer’s clients. She was struggling in her relationship when she decided to ask for help. In particular, when her relationship was at the beginning her boyfriend often used to go “radio silence”.
They were not in the very first days of their relationship when the flame of love and passion is still strong, but two or three months had passed by, enough for letting his boyfriend started sounding different, colder, more distant.
He didn’t text or call her back for several days. On James Bauer’s advice, Rachel used his 12-word formula to text his boyfriend (we’ll talk about it later). Soon enough, her boyfriend started calling her and send her tons of texts.
Rachel’s experience was a sparkle for Bauer himself: it pushed him to share his knowledge with more than one client at a time, and this is how the idea for the book came.
The 12-Word Secret Signal
At the end of the book, the 12-word secret is given to the reader. This isn’t some sort of magic trick, it’s a strategy that Bauer developed during his 12-year experience.
You need to read the full section to learn how to use this strategy; once you’ve gone through it, you’ll learn how to write simple texts (12-word texts) that hide a subtle “trigger phrase” that can awaken the hero instinct in your boyfriend, and make him call you, text you, drive all his attentions to you.
To have a better understanding of what the 12-word secret signal is, imagine that you will be going to send hidden signals towards your boyfriend.
He won’t be realizing it, but you will be driving his attention towards you and towards his future with you. What kind of signals are going to learn and send?
Without giving the details on the “how” (I don’t want to summarise the entire book here), here is an overview of the “what”:
- The Glimpse Phrase. It’s a phrase that you can tell or text to your boyfriend that will make him see the real you. It will be like sending a secret signal to him; without even realizing, he will want to have, know more of you. This simple phrase is aimed at giving him a glimpse of how amazing the future will be with you.
- The Fascination Signal. With this signal, you won’t only be becoming attractive to your man, you will become an emotional addiction to him, and this can create a bond a lot more stronger than simple physical attraction. This is one of the simplest phrases among the ones included in the guide and I was shocked that I had never been able to spot it by myself.
- Silent Action Signals. The signals you can send to your man aren’t only verbal. In the book, advice is given on how to make you more alluring at your boyfriend's eyes without saying a word. The book also gives information on how to notice whether or not your signals are working. In this case, for example, Bauers says that when you see your man trading to catch your eye and make you smile it means the signals have reached the target.
- “IOU” Signal. This is a very specific strategy that James Bauer shares in his book. It consists of swapping out 3 simple words that we say every day. This signal is aimed at building your man’s trust in you, at making you his only confidant at his eyes. You’ll see your boyfriend starting to open to you as he would do with his most trusted friends.
- Damsel In Distress Signal. All men have a natural protective instinct, and with this signal, you’ll tap straight into it. This is a signal that comes particularly in handy when you start noticing your boyfriend is distant, always at his phone, being dismissive.
- The Private Island Signal. With this signal, you are going to learn what is the characteristic that makes every man saying “she's the one”. Don’t worry, every woman is born with it, you just need to learn how to show it.
- The ex-back signal. This is a signal that can make your man comes back to you if he has been distant in the last period.
There are more signals included in the book. I just wanted to give you a glimpse of them, so that you can make an idea about what you can learn in the book and how the content can be helpful for your relationship.
I was a little skeptical when I started the reading but, I must say, I totally changed my mind.
The book is the result of deep research and long experience, but it makes you open your eyes to things that you’ve been experiencing every day in your relationship. They were in front of you and you just couldn’t see them.
I’ve started using the 12-word secret signal just for fun, to give a try on them. I must confess, I have noticed changes in my relationship with my husband.
I don’t think it is just because of these secret signals, but because I now understand my husband’s mind and behavior better, I understand why my relationship can take a certain turn and I know now how to intervene to make things right.
Who is His Secret Obsession suitable for?
The book is mainly aimed at women. As the title suggests, it wants to teach women how to become their man’s obsession. It provides strategies and techniques that women can use towards their men to improve the quality of their relationship.
However, and I’m bringing my experience on the table once more, I think that this book can be helpful even for men; after all, this is a book written by a man. My husband read it, and he discovers things about himself that he had never paid attention too.
This ebook isn’t a guide on how to trick a man and make him fall in love with you. It’s a chance for both members of the couple to improve their relationship, learn how to express their needs and feeling, and learn to understand the other’s ones.
Price and guarantee scheme
The price for the His Secret Obsession ebook is $47. It may seem expensive for an ebook, but it should be considered as a full guide on the matter.
Also, included in the price there are additional features, like the possibility of contacting a support team, or the possibility of having your expense refunded if you don’t obtain the results you wished for.
His Secret Obsession Guide comes with a 60-day money-money back guarantee. Ask for a refund within 60 days from your purchase if you are not happy with the product, you’ll have the entire amount of money you’ve spent back. No explanation is required.
Have you ever heard of a book with an available customer support? This should tell you something: this ebook is different. It’s more than a book or a simple guide. It’s a promise.
The promise of obtaining that strong, durable, and stable relationship you wish for. For this reason, the support of a team is offered in addition to the digital book. You can contact them by email, and even by phone!
With a quick look at their website, you’ll find the contact details.
Pros and Cons
- Immediate access to content: the program is provided in a digital book available for the download as soon as you complete your purchase.
- The content is well organized so that you can jump into a particular section when needed.
- The language is friendly and easy to understand.
- The experience of Rachel is extremely helpful for the understanding of the main concept of the book.
The only cons I could find about this program is that it may not work for anyone. This is why the author and his team offer a money-back guarantee I guess.
Love and relationships are not an exact science, so they wanted to be sure that those who don’t find the help they were searching for in the book could have their money back.
Recommendations and Conclusion
I found this book a precious resource for anyone involved in a relationship.
As a last piece of advice I’d like to say that, although the content of His Secret Obsession can be helpful to solve issues in a couple, or to recover from a breakup, I Suggest buying and reading it before things start going wrong.
Prevention is better than the cure as they say: the book can be a way of nurturing your relationship to avoid things going wrong, and make love last forever!